Thursday, September 14, 2006

Jeffrey Archer, Neanderthals, Gibraltar

Moving on from the disturbing news that Jeffrey Archer missed his gym session yesterday, it seems that a cave in Gibraltar was the last redoubt of the Neanderthals. The story is illustrated - I presume mistakenly - with the picture of a heavy metal rock singer whose name escapes me. I have always felt sorry for the Neanderthals but never more so than now. Gibraltar is a dismal place. Apart from the rather surly and spoilt apes, I associate The Rock with a large branch of Dixons, the second most unpleasant British company after Carphone Warehouse. Meanwhile, across the border are the glories of southern Spain. The Neanderthals retreated there in response to the capricious northern European weather and the onslaught of Cro-Magnon man - ie us. Finally, 24,000 years ago, they became extinct in Gib, leaving behind only a handful of worthless Dixons extended warranties. We owe them an apology.


  1. Bryan, I am now very much a convert and an ardent Archer watcher.

    But then, who wouldn't be?! This is gripping stuff.

    Admittedly, I was slightly concerned when he did miss the gym, but glad to see that he is saving children and I am warmed by a fan's heartfelt gratitude:

    "Thanks for some of the happiest hours of my life with some of your finest characters."

  2. James, I am delighted to have introduced you to this world of sunlight, charity and fine writing. I would urge you, however, to cultivate other interests - not, God forbid, to replace Jeffrey, but, as it were, to augment him. Staring too intently at his blog can have adverse neurological effects,