Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Wowser Rage

Yes that's all very well - but, while Britain sleeps and, as Bryan accurately observes, Nothing happens, the anti-alcohol wowsers tirelessly churn out their nonsense 'findings' - here's the latest - and drive the news agenda. So, examine your conscience: have you consumed more than (gasp) 8 'units of alcohol' in a week - or, ladies, 6? You, sir or madam, are a 'problem drinker'. The aim of this, all too clearly, is to turn respectable, middle-class, middle-aged drinkers into the Problem, thereby avoiding dealing with the real problem that is all too identifiable in its hideous roaring triumphalism in every town centre in the land every weekend. As with so many things, WE are the villains - and, by happy coincidence, we're docile, manageable and easily milked of our hard-earned money by the coercive State.
Never mind - the good news is that, once again, Springwatch (badgers, birds, otters etc) is beating Big Brother in the ratings.

12 comments:

  1. As an aside did you notice the disclaimer at the bottom of the story (and most others on C4's News site).

    "These news feeds are provided by an independent third party and Channel 4 is not responsible or liable to you for the same."

    So is the news true, accurate and correct?

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  2. Good point, Richard - and Channel 4 certainly wouldn't be my preferred source of news. It just happened to be the one that came up first.

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  3. respectable, middle-class, middle-aged drinkers

    Bit cute that, Nige. I know what a respectable, middle-class, middle-aged churchgoer is and also a respectable, middle-class, middle-aged home owner, but a respectable, middle-class, middle-aged drinker? Standing by for your post on respectable, middle-class, middle-aged smokers and wife-swappers.

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  4. I think, as a result of these shocking figures which cost so much shocking amounts of money(and what is life after all if it cannot be measured in terms of hard currency), they could drive the problem drinkers into the welcoming and benevolent arms of the super-casinos, then all wuld be well once again in Britain.

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  5. I refuse to watch Springwatch. It's cheap titillation and I refuse to be part of it.

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  6. As exemplified by peter burnett's lumping together smoking, wife-swapping and drinking, there's an unmistakable Puritan mood growing in this country - the reasons for it are hard to state - but they've virtually criminalised smoking and their next target is drinking. You won't have long to wait for skull and crossbone labels on Grand Cru wine bottles.

    The middle classes have to be specially targeted because they might be a little sceptical and resist the government's propaganda so they have to be whipped into line.

    Where will the Treasury get the massive revenue it will lose if the state manages to stop smoking and drinking?

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  7. I had a thought yesterday regarding the anti-smoking campaign. Smokers to be permitted only to smoke outside in special designated smoking-areas. These smoking areas to be a little out of the ordinary and to consist of structures known as stocks. Local councils should keep the immediate vicinity well suppled with rotten fruit which decent non-smoking citizens should be encouraged to throw at high rates of velocity at the relevant drug-addict. He or indeed she should be made to wallow and squirm in his/her humilation, and verbal abuse should accompany the fruit throwing with frequent mention of not wanting to "inhale your second-hand smoke, you prick."

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  8. Actually another idea would be to have posters by the smoking areas offering suggestions to the less imaginatively gifted regarding abusive one-liners such as "murdering our unborn children", "burden on the State" and "bad breath."

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  9. Capital idea, Andrew - and a great photo (where is that?) - tho I think it's technically a pillory. Clearly designed by a visionary centuries ahead of his time. The stocks would be ideal for drinkers, enabling them to sit down and indulge amid a shower of rotten vegetables and teetotal abuse. That would kill two birds with one stone - or cabbage.

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  10. "Stocks" in America, "Pillories" in Jolly Olde.

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  11. I htink you may be right about the pillory, Nige. I think Susan the stocks were soley for the legs and so the pillory is indeed our man.
    From somewhere or other:

    People convicted of notorious crimes such as attempted sodomy, seditious words, extortion, fraud, and perjury were punished publicly in the pillory as a way of destroying the reputation of the convict and signalling public distaste for the crime.

    Set up in busy streets or open spaces, such as Cheapside or Charing Cross, where crowds could easily gather, the culprit (most were men) was placed on a platform with his arms and head placed through holes in the wooden structure. He was normally required to stay there one hour.

    The pillory turned so that crowds on all sides could get a good view, and the crowd expressed their disapproval of the offence by pelting the offender with rotten eggs and vegetables, blood and guts from slaughterhouses, dead cats, mud and excrement, and even bricks and stones. Some died from the abuse, despite increasing efforts by constables to protect the convict, by forming a ring around the pillory.

    In some cases of seditious words, however, the crowd applauded the convict, pelted him with flowers, and collected money to present to him after his release.

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