Wednesday, September 26, 2007

The Soft Toy Caption


28 comments:

  1. Budget cuts in Lion King Kingdom force sale of excess wives

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  2. Items seized as evidence by Middle East island officials investigating child sex ring purportedly involving resident American celebrity

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  3. Are you sure you're a feline? Let me hear you growl.

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  4. Hey, I've got stripes and that tiger over there is just as white as I am, so who's to know?

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  5. Concerned friends of Happy Cat gather to coordinate efforts to restore his joie de vivre.

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  6. I recognize that look your in your eye, and don't even think about it - I am not your next meal.

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  7. Afraid that I'm adrift without Ian to challenge me and this insomnia can't be good for my health, Bryan. (33 hours no sleep until 4 today) Time for Ambien, I think. And if that doesn't work, the heavy artillery, Restoril.

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  8. Bestiality proponents protest parliamentary prejudice

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  9. Britney opens stall at Cromer Fair. Locals call it 'The Lion, The Bitch and the Roarload'

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  10. ''Anyone fancy the Zebra?''

    ''Nah, we're all stuffed!''

    (that's one for the kids and the greens)

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  11. so you're a Norfolk Snow Linx! It's a good job you said something cos Leo thought he could smell zebra.

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  12. well yeah, the boredom, the farting, the constant feeling of hunger - I just got fed up with the vegetarian lifestyle...

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  13. Spit-roast? okay, but that'll be twenty quid extra and no kissing.

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  14. I'm sorry, Zebra, but democracy doesn't mean every individual gets what they voted for.

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  15. ''you say Blue Peter viewers voted for you to be called Pussy? Someone's head is gonna roll...

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  16. "Hey baby, bend me, shape me, any way you want me."
    sigh ... "We can't go on meeting like this, I feel such an ass."

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  17. RSPCA "unhappy" as local man is fined £30 plus costs for over-feeding the 9 tigers and 4 lions he keeps in his two-room flat. Spokesman said " It's terrible when all they need for full fitness is a daily slice of Zebra rump and the occasional romp down the Old Kent Road"

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  18. deary me, Mr. Ed, you been leaning against those wet railings again?!

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  19. science is marvelous. not only is the meat bar coded for efficient shopping but it's also marked out for suggested portion control.

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  20. bloody Halo 3, is it?! Just a few good years and that's us consigned to the scrap heap that is past joys...

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  21. of course, when you look at the modern army now, I wish great granddad had gone to the patent office instead of selling mum to the circus...

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  22. I heard a plastic heron's just moved into the garden at no. 32. So much for our hopes of gentrification!

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  23. well you may think it's an erosion of your basic civil rights but I knew this bloke once, didn't have a kite-mark and he lost an eye!

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  24. Frankly, I hope more people read Dawkins because I've read Christian meat is the tops!

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  25. Hey, that Afghan Camel's lost a lot of weight recently. It must be all that medication he took for the flight.

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  26. Henri Rousseau's models reminisce... 'Some of the comments were quite hurtful, weren't they, Clarence?'

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