Thursday, October 25, 2007

The Airbus A380

An insanely busy day has kept me from the blog, but I am overcome with the need to point out that the Airbus A 380 is a bloody ugly machine. It appears to be suffering from hydrocephalus. It also looks as though it was designed by a child as just a fatter version of any old plane. The 747 is one of the most beautiful machines ever built and almost all Boeing planes show clear signs of the workings of a high aesthetic intelligence. Airbus is just a committee. Flying is hell these days. Making it ugly as well is the last straw.

16 comments:

  1. I believe Alan Johnson is sending a note to its parents.

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  2. Happy St C day, the two of them. While the wish may seem a little off, given the cobblers tanners and co. trades. They did have a very real connection to the scribes.

    While the 'plane is a bit of a pig of a thing, I believe it will be loved. Much as the Morris minor was loved in a deeper meaningful ugly child sort of way.

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  3. Can't see this one with half-timbering though...

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  4. do you think if they used those jagged patterns they painted old battleships with to break up the outline it would help Bryan? I know BA tried it but they only did it to the tailfins

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  5. or of course you could just pay that little bit more to sit inside during the flight then you wouldn't have to look at the exterior and the wind wouldn't mess your hair up either

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  6. A smiley face on the front, that's what it needs - it wld look like a dolphin and everyone wld love it.

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  7. this reminds me of that Cornish bloke who wanted picture windows installed in his cliff-side cottage. everyone complained that it made it look horrible but he said, quite rightly, that the whole point of his cottage was to be on the inside looking out.

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  8. I wish you'd all leave it alone. You can't beat a well-shaved super-jumbo smelling of new oil.

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  9. This is the half timbered creation, methinks. And the reason I think it needs a pat. For God sake they shipped a huge amount of the thing from Bristol to Toulouse.

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  10. The smiley face has been done, Nige - PSA, and airline in California did that to all their planes about 20(?) years ago. Besides, in the event of mishap, it just wouldn't do to have cellphone photos of a grinning Airbus just before impact with the ground.

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  11. How many people does this behemoth hold and how long will you have to queue to board? Will there be a first aid station for those overcome by exhaustion or boredom? How about overnight accomodations for those at the end of the line?

    I can see it now: "The flight arrives 13:00 Tuesday, Mr. Jones. You are scheduled to deplane with group #GG, and should be on your way about 7:00AM Wednesday/"

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  12. I was thinking an enigmatic dolphin smile - which would sit better with death and disaster.

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  13. Not just ugly but highly dangerous - tail fins fall off these things with surprising regularity. Well, would you believe a little bit?

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  14. This monstrosity flew over my home a few weeks ago on a PR tour during Fleet Week. Its shadow swept over my neighborhood, momentarily blotting out the sun.

    I would not want to fly on one of these -- looks like something from a scrapped "Airport" movie.

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